Breastfeeding vs the Bottle : My experience with feeding twin girls.

So I know this is a touchy subject. The breastfeeding police might leave a flaming bag of baby poop on my front door step tonight but I really want people to hear my experience so that maybe they’ll be more prepared than I was. I read a ton of blogs and books about breastfeeding twins but for some reason they really didn't help me much when it came time to nourish my tiny preemie babies. Every baby and mom is different so you sometimes just have to roll with the punches. Don’t get frustrated, listen to others advice with a grain of salt, and do what you think is best for your family.

I was a bottle fed formula baby and so was my mother. My husband and his siblings were exclusively breast fed. I had heard that breastfeeding was “the best thing you could do for your child’s health” but was skeptical because I was formula fed and am actually a really healthy adult. In truth breast feeding was appealing because it seemed cheap and convenient. No bottle warming, no formula mixing, and no washing tons of bottles. My husband was supportive either way, “They're your boobs!”. I also heard that breastfeeding would help my body get back to it’s pre-pregnancy condition (I know it sounds selfish but what can I say?).

Cookie and Peanut were preemies who started getting their nourishment through feeding tubes. There is nothing that can put more guilt in a mother than seeing her 3lb babies hooked up to machines with tubes running down their throats. I felt so helpless while they were in the NICU (I’ll write more on the NICU experience later). I was weak, sore, full of pain medication, and low on iron after the surgery. Our hospital had an in room pump as well as a department of nurses dedicated to helping moms breastfeed. There was a lot of pressure to breastfeed at my hospital! I had a coach visit every day, was required to watch videos before I could check out from the hospital, and was given lots of pamphlets outlining the benefits of breastfeeding. Whatever tiny amount of milk I could squeeze out was put into the girls feeding machine which gave me a sense that I was helping them in some way. Unfortunately, pumping was a lot harder than it seemed. In the beginning the machine could pump for 20 minutes and barely squeeze out a drop or two. A nurse taught me hand milking techniques that were supposed to help with my supply but instead made me feel like my boobs were on fire (I can’t imagine what this felt like without my pain medication cocktail). It also made me feel like a cow which was not good for post pregnancy hormones.

After day three in the NICU, the nurses started to try and bottle feed the girls. Whatever they couldn’t finish was put into the feeding tube because weight gain was so important at this stage. My supply started to come in a bit but apparently the “oh so perfect” breast milk I gave them had to be supplemented with a preemie neosure powder in order to give the babies more calories. I struggled a lot with trying to keep up with the twins appetite but they took more and more of the bottle every day. Soon the hospital decided Cookie was strong enough to try and directly breastfeed. A nursing coach came to help me with my first try. It was an awful experience for both me and Cookie. She was so hungry and I was so frustrated that the session ended in tears as I popped a bottle into her mouth. The nurses gave me many techniques to help with latching that may as well ended with me standing on my head while reciting Shakespeare. We kept trying and it did get easier but the girls often got frustrated with my slow flow ending in yet another bottle.

Before I knew it, it was time to take the girls home. This is when things really became tough. I had decided to let the girls have their bottle but I would still give them pumped breastmilk. None of us really got much of a “bond experience” from breastfeeding anyway. Snuggling with them and kissing their precious little heads seemed to make me feel much closer than popping my boob into their mouth. Unfortunately, pumping at a machine can take up to 25 minutes which doesn’t sound so bad until you realise you’re pumping every couple of hours. On top of that, if you want your supply to stay strong then you have to pump through the night too. My weight and energy really took a hit with a mixture of surgery recovery, iron depletion, sleep deprivation, and the calories required to produce enough milk for two babies.

One day, while sitting at my usual pump station both girls decided to throw little baby fits. They were hungry but I was still hooked up to the machine and had at least another 20 minutes of pumping left. My dog thought that it was a great time to have a barking fit at some squirrel he spotted in the backyard and while I was distracted I guess I had broken the seal on the pump cups causing all the precious milk to spill down my pants. Standing there in the middle of my living room with my boobs exposed looking like I had wet my pants with two children and a dog whaling, I decided that my twin girls would be formula babies. I put on my shirt, mixed two bottles with some sample formula we got in the mail, and fed my girls who greedily drank every drop. I haven't breastfed since. I was warned that my breasts would be in a lot of pain as my supply dried up but they actually felt better. I was also told that my mood would darken as my hormones went crazy when I stopped breastfeeding. On the contrary, I felt freed. Free to get more things done, free to snuggle with the girls more, and free to sleep for longer stretches. I didn’t smell like sour milk anymore and I was relieved to get rid of those awful nursing pads. My mood improved and you could feel a sigh of relief go through the house as we all settled into a more manageable routine.


Peanut is trying to eat Cookie.

I sometimes felt a bit guilty about switching to formula but when I think about how much my family’s quality of life seemed to improve I decide it was for the best. Over the next month or two, it seems like everyone I met on the street wanted to know if I breastfed. People at my office would ask,”How are the girls,” followed immediately by, “Are you breastfeeding?” I found this really odd. It seems to have become a social norm to ask this question. What is it any of their business on how I feed my children? Perhaps this is just another sign of how much breast feeding social pressure we have been taught to place on other people. Women who had never even had kids were giving me the stink eye for using the dreaded formula. One lady even suggested I look for a breast milk donation program in our area. I guess other mothers with increased supply either sell or give away their milk so that poor dried up mothers have something decent to feed to their children (please note the sarcasm). Eventually, I just grew thicker skin and ignored the peanut gallery.

So to sum up my post:
Mothers who exclusively breastfeed twins for 1+ years please go to your local bakery and buy yourself a very large cookie. You can eat that cookie on your “breastaversary” (yes that is a thing now).
Mothers who formula feed please ignore the peanut gallery. You are not a bad mother and your children will probably not chastise you when they’re adults about not breastfeeding them.



Multitasking.

Twin Baby Registry - What you need and what you don't need.

After having twins I feel I’m drowning in baby furniture, toys, formula, and diapers. Hopefully you can benefit from our trial and error adventure through baby registry land. Take note that these things worked for us and our babies but might not work for everyone. Some things people might find controversial but I’m not usually one to follow the baby danger trends (i.e. Baby Einstein creating dumb children, Walkers causing development issues, Bumbos giving children back problems, etc…). I look out for recalls and use common sense with what I put the girls in. I don’t let them sit in Bumbos for hours and we always keep an eye on the twins no matter what they’re doing. This is not a complete list of everything you’ll use and you by no means NEED all of this junk. My motto is usually “Less is More” but I have found it useful to have plenty of options for entertainment when juggling baby twins on your own.

Most useful twin baby registry items:

• Leachco Podster Sling-Style Infant Seat Lounger - My Mom got these silly things on a whim through amazon one day. I thought we’d never use them but boy was I wrong! I exclusively bottle feed the girls in these pillows and they nap in them all the time. They sort of cradle the baby’s body and my twins find them very comfortable.
• Bumbo Floor Seat - This is yet another thing I thought was stupid that we now use every day. Our daycare introduced us to the Bumbo Seat and it really helped Cookie with her neck control. We face two bumbos towards each other and let the girls play footsie for a while.

Footsie!

• Graco Pack 'n Play - This has been great when we go to other people’s houses. The girls can nap when need be.
• Dr. Brown's Bottle Warmer - I wouldn’t be surprised if we burnt this thing out one day. It gets a lot of use and always warms the bottles perfectly.
• Dr. Brown's Formula Mixing Pitcher - This has helped save us time by mixing a full pitcher of formula every morning. In the beginning the girls went through nearly 20 bottles a day!
• Graco DuoGlider Classic Connect Stroller with Classic Connect Car Seats - I’ve had no complaints about this stroller or the car seats. It folds easily and the car seats fit into the stroller with a click. The stroller seats recline when someone needs a nap and there’s plenty of storage under the stroller for long trips. I like the cup holders for both the twins and mom.
• Baby Trend Walker Hello Kitty - I wish we had two of these. This has been the only walker short enough for the girls to actually reach the ground in. Every other one we’ve tried is too tall and by the time Peanut is tall enough for the others she’ll probably be walking on her own. The babies love hopping around in them and have recently started chasing the dog around the house.
• Old Fashioned Crank Swings - My mother in law found the swings she used with her children on ebay. They use a hand crank to swing rather than batteries and have become the workhorses of our baby entertainment collection. When both babies are cranky and need rocking but there is only one set of arms available then a swing serves as my backup. I also like not having to replace the batteries every week like we did with our vibration seats.
• Fisher-Price Deluxe Bouncer - These were useful for about three months but now we hardly use them. When the girls were tiny the vibration and sound soothed them down for naps but for some reason don’t work as well anymore. They were also helpful during those first nights when no one felt like sleeping. Make sure to have a million C batteries ready.
• Cloth bibs - The more the merrier. They drool so much!
• Onesies with crotch snaps - Also, the more the merrier. We got lots of fancy baby clothes but these are the most versatile. The NICU only allowed this type of clothing.
• Fletcher's Laxative, Root Beer, 3.25 Ounce - Weird, I know but my mother in law swears by it. Formula often causes constipation issues and this stuff has really helped give some relief to Cookie when she’s stopped up. The other constipation medicine has been too strong and gave the girls gas. This was much more gentle and is made of natural ingredients (whatever that means).
• Gripe Water - This helped the twins with cranky fits and gassy tummy pain. It soothed them when they got a pit colicky.

Not so useful registry stuff:

• Fancy bottles - Dr. Brown’s bottles have nearly five parts to them causing you to go through Ikea assemblage every time you wash them. Those bottles with the bag insert are also a pain to put together. The Tommie Tippie bottles leaked when the nipples caved in on themselves during feedings and they don’t fit in our bottle warmer. Glass bottles were too heavy and I dropped one on our tile floor causing a mess. In the end, the girls favorite bottles came from the Dollar Store. They are reliable, have a faster flow, and were cheap. We’ve found that a bottle is just a bottle and you don’t need the fancy $15 ones.
• Boppie - After two washes caused by projectile vomit (thank goodness those have stopped) the pillow is too flat for the girls. It was nice when they were tiny and I used it to snuggle with them but they grew out of that quickly. I got the most use out of it while Breast Feeding at the NICU but I don’t think they are worth the expensive price tag.
• Plastic Bibs - These seemed like a great idea until Peanut started using them to teeth on and Cookie saw what she was doing and thought, “What a great idea!”.  This made for some extra messy feeding sessions. When food fell on the bib the baby would rub it all over her face while trying to chew on the plastic. They came out cleaner without the bibs so we don’t use them anymore.
• Feety Pajamas - First of all note that we live in Florida and the girls were born in March. These things are just too warm for a Florida Spring but we received some feety pajamas from friends. The first time I put one of these on Peanut she wailed for 15 minutes. I think that she hated her feet being covered up. There are also a million snaps on these things which is a pain when you change 12 diapers a day!
• Sack Outfits - These are those outfits with the drawstring on the bottom like SweatPea wore in Popeye cartoons. Again, Peanut hated that her feet were covered and these are too hot for Florida.
• Hats, Socks, Headbands, and Bows - The twins pull all of these things off the minute I turn my back. They were cute for pictures but end up on the floor every time. The bows are cute but my girls don’t have enough hair to hold them yet.
• Pacifiers - I was all ready with a dozen different pacifiers but in the end I think they only cause the girls to be more pissed off when they’re crying. It’s like, “How could you give me this thing instead of fill in unknown baby need here.” I guess it’s for the best because we’ll never have to wean them off the habit.
• Wipe Warmer - Cookie giggles as you wipe her butt no matter what temperature the wipe is.
• Changing Tables - I’m all about multifunctional furniture so we got a dresser that doubles as a changing table. When the girls are off diapers I’ll just take the changing pad away and we’ll still have a dresser. Also, many changing tables seemed a bit unstable and Peanut wiggles way too much for that.
• Tandem Breastfeeding Pillows - Great idea but poor execution. Balancing two squirming babies on a pillow while trying to shove a boob in their mouth ended in three crying girls (two babies and mom).