Bottles, Binkies, Lovies, and Walkies

  My girls have only formed attachments to people and my dog. I have seen too many kids with a full set of teeth and a pacify in their mouth. I see children that can walk on their own but have a bottle dangling from their clenched teeth. There has also been a big stroller movement where kids that have far exceeded the weight limit on strollers are still being pushed around. If your kids knees are touching their ears so they can avoid their feet from dragging on the floor then they are too big for a stroller! If your kids teeth are biting holes through pacifiers and bottle nipples then it's time to take them away. I knew a kid who fell asleep at night with a bottle in his mouth. His teeth were so rotted that a dentist had to manually pull all his baby teeth out rather than let them fall out naturally.

  My girls are about to hit one year old and they have two bottles a day. One before nap time and one at bedtime. They don't seem particularly attached to their bottles but like the warm formula to nod off to. We introduced sippy cups at 6 months and have phased out bottles little by little. To keep the girls from becoming attached to the bottle we have followed a few rules. Once the baby has finished her bottle we take it away. We don't let them carry it around the room, we don't leave it with them at night or during naps, and we don't let them play with it. This has caused the bottle to become a bit boring in their eyes. Sippy cups and adult cups are much more interesting. They contain different flavors than the bottle and the girls like mimicking the older daycare children. Many parents complain that the bottle has become a big comfort for when the child is feeling insecure. When my kids are feeling insecure I hold them and comfort them myself. In daycare they usually attach to the main caregiver for security. Don't pop a binky in your child's mouth every time they cry and don't shove a bottle at your baby when they are being fussy. "But the hospital popped a pacifier in my baby's mouth and now we can't get rid of it." The NICU did the same thing to my girls to stave off hunger or to administer sugar water. Peanut had a heart condition that required a two day fast due to medicine requirements and the sugar water helped to keep the girls heart rate down when they became too manic. Once we got home I put the pacifiers away only to be used in emergencies like when we were stuck in traffic and couldn't give the baby a bottle. I threw all our pacifiers away at three months old.

NICU Pacifier

  To keep anyone from becoming attached to one toy or blanket I have been rotating everything when they become used to it. Why not let the baby get attached to a dolly or a blanket? I want the girls to develop their own coping mechanisms. I want them to be adaptable for inevitable changes in life. Dolly got chewed up by the dog? Oh, well. It's sad but it's not the end of the world. Grandma needs to take care of the babies because mommy has a major stomach flu? No big deal. Grandma doesn't have the same bottles, formula, or toys that are given at home but the girls are used to changing equipment. The girls feel secure at grandma's house because grandma makes them feel secure. We have even practiced separating the girls from each other so that they can cope with being apart. Cookie has more doctor's appointment because of her torticollis which leaves Peanut by herself at daycare. You can tell that Peanut is not being as brave about exploring the play area like she usually does but she isn't having a complete melt down about her sister's absence.

  I also don't like how long parents are keeping their kids in strollers now a days. Strollers have become such a crutch for parents to lean on. They all say it's because the child gets tired too quickly and needs to rest. If your child has been walking for a long time and needs a break than why not take a break? You sit down on a bench and people watch or have a snack. Walking is so important for a child's development and health. If you take your kid out to walk often then they will build the stamina to keep up with you later. In the end I think strollers for older kids is just pure laziness on the parents part. If your kid is in a stroller then you don't have to worry about them running off somewhere. You don't have to watch them as closely or teach them not to run out into traffic. Give the kid an iPad, strap them into a stroller, and forget about them for the next few hours. A lazy parent breeds a lazy child. Now parents can't figure out why their kids are all obese. Well if they don't walk anywhere themselves and you shove goldfish crackers in their mouths all day then what did you think would happen?

  Let your child grow up. Sometimes it's the parent that is attached to things and not the child. Keeping a pacifier in your kid's mouth will not slow down the aging process. Enjoy each stage of life and celebrate each milestone. You are not doing your baby any favors by holding on to every childhood habit. I personally can't wait to throw away our last diaper!